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A News Clip From “Go Topless Jeep Weekend” Is Going Viral Because “Not Even SNL Could Write Something This Ridiculous”

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A News Clip From “Go Topless Jeep Weekend” Is Going Viral Because “Not Even SNL Could Write Something This Ridiculous”

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“I’ve been in quarantine and I need to party!”

It’s the most wonderful time of year.

Go Topless Jeep Weekend in Southeast Texas!

In the middle of a global pandemic!

Vroom vroom!

Thousands of people came to the Bolivar Peninsula over the weekend to celebrate the sacred tradition.

A 12 News Now report from this weekends’ festivities is going viral because you can’t make this shit up.

Not even SNL could not write something as ridiculous as this actual, real news report from my local station

“I’ve been in quarantine and I need to party,” this party deprived person said.

“Wash them hands for 20-seconds and keep them clean with Germ-X!!,” she continued.

“What’s better than beach, and a few drinks, and jeeps,” this beaded woman cheered. “It doesn’t get any better than that!”

140 people were arrested over the weekend but it probably wasn’t for breaking social distancing rules.

“It’s not possible to do this (social distancing) on this beach with the amount of people we have on this beach here,” Sergeant Mark McGaffey said.

“When you start acting silly, we got a jail that’s got a whole lotta empty holes,” he said.

Still, law enforcement seemed pretty chill.

“Law enforcement definitely made their visi-dability and made people chill out and not be as crazy,” the beaded lady said.

“The cops are doing their job and as long as they don’t be mean to people who are actually being innocent then I’m all gravy baby,” our first lady of sanitation finished.

All gravy baby, indeed!

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