Yup…that’s America for ya.
“A backwoods, northern Wisconsin gas station with a big fence on which was painted in enormous letters: CHAINSAWS. CHEESE. GUNS.”
“The show To Catch A Predator. There must have been some sort of marathon of it because I remember my whole family watching it, jaws dropped, for hours.”
“Your news. It’s over sensationalized. I couldn’t believe it when I visited. Every news program seems much less like news and more like reality TV.”
“The coupons. I was visiting a friend of mine who is from the states, and she bought a book of coupons. The discounts you could get was ridiculously fantastic!”
“A young girl beckoning her almost spherical dog with ‘C’mere budder nugget,’ said with an appropriately strong accent. Absolutely flawless American experience.”
“I was there for a student exchange some years ago, and I was pretty weirded out by the Pledge of Allegiance. Nobody told me you guys do that, so when on my first day everyone suddenly stood up and started reciting some stuff to a flag, I briefly wondered if my organization left me in the hands of some cult school.”
“The overwhelming number of American flags. Flags everywhere — on store fronts, on lawns, all over public property, on people’s cars. So many flags. It was all very ‘YOU’RE IN AMERICA AND DON’T YOU GODDAMN FORGET IT.'”
“When I first arrived here, the most noticeable thing was the size of a one-person, small pho noodle soup was the same size of my whole family’s dinner soup back home.”
“One time, my girlfriend took me to an American Girl Doll store — like one of the huge ones that has its own building. And boy, I was not prepared for that. These dolls were treated a little too realistically for my taste.”
“The size of rats and the amount of cockroaches. I saw a roadkill cockroach the size of a tennis ball at the Grand Canyon. I have lived in Berlin for years, and I am yet to see any rat that comes close to New York rats.”
“I was in New York walking in Times Square. I was standing at a stoplight waiting to cross the street and a guy next to me was watching porn on a tablet with the sound turned on.”
Have you ever visited America and been shocked by these things, too? Let me know in the comments below!
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